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The ABC’s of Mental Health and Happiness

How well do you know your ABC’s of mental health and happiness? Let’s start at the very beginning–although you will see that the alphabet of skills below is really a circle that starts and ends...

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Where Does the Time Go? 5 Tips to Conscious Connection

“What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life—to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories.”  –George Eliot The wish to seek and have a deep sense of...

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7 Warning Signs Of a Troubled Marriage

I’ve been counseling couples and families for over three decades and one thing stands out. Most people wait too long before they reach out for help…years too long. Problems that might have been solved...

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Unhappy Relationships and Depression Go Hand in Hand

“What is the opposite of two? A lonely me. A lonely you.” -Richard Wilbur “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” -Friedrich Nietzsche The TV ads would have...

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6 Tips for Breaking the Blame Barrier

Hardly a day ever goes by when I don’t hear someone blaming someone for something. It is one of the most common–and one of the most frustrating patterns that confront couples and families. Blame can...

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The Aftermath of the Isla Vista Massacre: What Can Be Learned

The tragedy in Isla Vista has left my precious Santa Barbara community—and the nation—reeling. The senseless violence, claiming the lives of innocent young people, has stimulated many different...

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10 Tips to Help Kids Cope with War & Traumatic Events

“I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask, ‘Mother, what was war?’” ~Eve Merriam These are uncertain, turbulent times, colored as they are by fears about war and terrorism. As a result,...

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Do You Want to Avoid the Next Fight?

Most people are now aware that high levels of conflict–loud, angry or bitter fighting–can be tremendously destructive not only to marriages and intimate relationships but can cause lasting harm to the...

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Are You Tending Your Garden of Love?

“Your family and your love must be cultivated like a garden. Time, effort, and imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship flourishing and growing.”  -Jim Rohn The wish for a deep...

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What We Have Here is a Failure to Communicate!

I am constantly shocked and reminded just how easy it is to hurt or be hurt by our loved ones due to problems of communication. Communication is supposed to consist of both talking and listening in...

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